WELCOME TO SEASON 5 OF BLASEBALL.
It’s somehow already a new Season of The Cultural Event That Is Blaseball and though only five Days have passed, I, Benson “Nutty” Newton, am ready to bring you some fresh updates concerning Offseason happenings and the first few Days of competition.
TARGETED SHAME AND alternate realities.
As always, the Postseason brings some of the largest changes to the landscape of Blaseball. The end of Season 4 continued this tradition, with the Targeted Shame (72,209 votes) and Alternate Reality (52,343 votes) Decrees being enacted by the Blaseball Elector Committee.
Targeted Shame punishes the Top 4 teams of Season 4 (Hades Tigers, Chicago Firefighters, New York Millennials and Breckenridge Jazz Hands) with negative runs equal to their Shame in the game following getting Shamed. I’m not quite sure how effective this will be at tamping down these very strong teams, especially since they’re less likely to be shamed in the first place.
Alternate Reality made major waved across the League, as it cause a Hitter and Pitcher on every Blaseball team to be replaced with an Alternate Reality version of themselves, with completely new stats to match. These changes did a good job of Taming the Tigers (though they’re still one of the strongest teams in the League) and somehow made the poor Unlimited Tacos even weaker.
A NEW ELECTION
ONE MYSTERY DECREE WILL BE CHOSEN.
With a new Season comes a new Election full of Decrees for Electors to explore. However, this Election is unique compared to those of the past.
While a normal Election has at least some information about its Decrees, these new 6 options (Titled Confuse Good, High Filter, Diagonal World, Parallel World, Do Nothing and Confuse Evil) are complete mysteries! In addition to the mysterious selection, only one of these Decrees will be put into place instead of the customary two. I can’t wait to see what effects this Season’s Election will have on the League!
IDOLS. IDOLS. IDOLS. IDOLS. IDOLS. IDOLS. IDOLS. IDOLS. IDOLS. IDOLS. IDOLS. IDOLS. IDOLS. IDOLS. IDOLS.
Following the near-constant Feedback of Season 4, Season 5 seems set to be filled with Days worth of Reverb, continually echoing from the massive storms of Feedback that lasted over 100 Days. While we’re still seeing Feedback storms (in addition to Peanuts and Eclipses, like we’re perfectly used to at this point), Reverb seems to have an effect unlike anyone or anything in Blaseball has ever seen.
On Day 5 of Season 5, Reverb’s effects became instantly clear. As the terrible sound echoed around their opponents Stadium, something about the sound caused something to click in the minds of several Hawaii Friday’s Hitters and Batters, causing them to swap places on their own team! Jacob Winner and Karato Bean have swapped from pitching to hitting and Bevan Underbuck and Sixpack Dogwalker elected to replace them on the almighty Blaseball mound. I can’t wait to see how else other teams will be affected by this mysterious happening. Maybe it’ll Tame the Tigers.
THE UNDERDOG BITES HARD
THE LEAGUE’S MOST UNLUCKY OUTFIT PICK UP FIRST WIN IN MASSIVE UPSET
Ending Day 5 of competition with a bang, the massive Underdogs and seemingly perennially unlucky and under-skilled Unlimited Tacos put up a huge 7-2 win on the 80% favored Chicago Firefighters. Congrats to the now 1-4 Tacos on picking up their first win of Season 5 versus such a strong opponent!
THAT’S ALL FOLKS.
Anyways. That’s all I have for now. A new Season is underway with new Effects, Weather, and Elections to look out for. No matter what team you root for, I hope that you enjoy watching Season 5 of The Cultural Event That Is Blaseball.