LETS LOOK BACK AT THE FIRST FIFTY GAMES OF SEASON FOUR OF THE CULTURAL EVENT THAT IS BLASEBALL.
Hey everybody, it’s me, Benson “Nutty” Newton here with the real big one, that think you’ve all been waiting for. That’s right. it’s time for all the big happenings of the first half of Season 4, all bundled into one tidy, massively large place. Without further ado, lets get started.
This Season’s new twist, Feedback, has dynamically changed the landscape of the entire Blaseball league.
Feedack, the mysterious storms that assail so many of our Blaseball games this season seem to have quite the odd effect. At the most inopportune times, Players are forced to swap allegiances from one team to another. This effect has yet to effect some teams throughout the first half of the season but has somehow managed to effect the Philly Pies twice! Here are the Feedback occurrences thus far.
It didn’t take long for the Blaseball universe to find out the effects of these Feedback storms, as in a mysterious event, the Chicago Firefighter’s 4* Hitter Paula Mason and Dallas Steaks’ 2.5* Hitter Thomas Kirby swapped team allegiances after their head-to-head competition on Day 4 of the season. Though well over 50 games had been effected by Feedback by Day 4, this was the first direct effect BNN observed it having on any player.
Mere moments after winning a game in which they were favored, the feedback that surrounded the match gave the New York Millennials a loss. The strange weather conditions forced the teams 1.5* hitter Alyssa Harrel to switch allegiances to their opponent and division rival, the Yellowstone Magic, in return for the 1* Hitter Penelope Matthews.
While through 24 games of Season 4 we only saw two instances of Feedback impacting Blaseball, it was followed by two instances within six games. In a seemingly otherwise routine Crabs victory over the Jazz Hands, feedback struck once again during day 25. The crabs exchanged 3.5* batter Valentine Games with the Jazz Hands with actual Blaseball playing fox, 2.5* batter Tot Fox.
In a statement released to BNN, Tot Fox seemed to regret not doing what they could in order to stop the Feedback Frenzy from occurring. Maybe next time.
Just several games later, after a Moist Talkers win, Workman Gloom was separated from his beloved puppy Beasley Gloom, a treasured teammate on the Shoe Thieves. In return for Workman Gloom, the Moist Talkers sent over Joe Vorhees, a trade with which nobody seemed happy about.
After a win over the favored Garages on Day 36, the Dalés lost their beloved 1.5* Hitter, Farrell Seagull to the opposing team. In return, they gained the 2* Hitter Avila Guzman. We’ve yet to see major impact from this mysterious trade, but we’re sure big things are to come.
On day 37, the humble Houston Spies defeated the favored Philly Pies. In a massive frenzy of Feedback during the game however, the 2* Hitter Yeong-Ho Benitez of the Spies and 2* Hitter Marrow Wilson traded places seemingly at random! While this Feedback trade may appear even on paper, Marrow Wilson is a great 4.5* defender compared to Yeong-Ho Benitez’s 2*.
Right at the beginning of a three game series between the Hades Tigers and the Philly Pies, a massive storm of feedback sent 2x League MVP 5.5* Hitter and Wielder of the Dial Tone Jessica Telephone back to her Season 2 home, the Philly Pies. The Pies aren’t to be confused with Season 1 home, the Dallas Steaks. In return for arguably the best player in all of Blaseball, the League Leading Hades Tigers received the 1* Batting Spears Taylor. However, as a 4* Defensive expert, Taylor brings a much needed boost to what was once the worst defense in The Evil League.
The transfer of Jessica to the Pies raises a large amount of questions surrounding the rest of the season. Will this spark a Pies comeback, helping them reach the playoffs and Ascension after their third ILB title win? Will the loss of such a strong player lessen calls for Taming the Tigers? We can’t wait to find out.
RECORD SMASHING PERFORMANCES THE FANS LOVE.
In Day 3 of competition, the Hawaii Fridays put up 23 runs to the Charleston Shoe Thieves’ 8, setting a new single game score record, beating the previous record of 20 runs! Congratulations to the Fridays for this great team effort and all that it involves. BNN is sure this record will be broken before we know it, however!
Another set of 10 games brought about another record smashed. During day 21, the Flowers vs. Steaks match up went a lengthy 22 innings, breaking the previous record of 20 innings set by the Jazz Hands and Moist Mouths in Season 3. Congratulations to the Steaks for having the endurance to squeak out a 4-3 win.
THOUGH IT’S NO LONGER THE PEAK OF DISCIPLINE AS IT WAS IN SEASON 3, WE STILL HAVE TRAGICALLY LOST SEVERAL PLAYERS THROUGH THE FIST HALF OF SEASON 4.
In memoriam:whit steakknife
Tragically, during a routine solar eclipse game vs. the San Francisco Lovers, beloved Kansas City Breath Mints Hitter Whit Steakknife was incinerated. This is the first incineration of what many hoped would be a less tragic season than before. However, the Discipline Era lives on, which means we’re sure to still see plenty of incarcerations to come. We wish the Breath Mints Blaseball family well as they continue playing through the loss of their friend and teammate, a literal knife.
IN MEMORIAM: STEVENSON MONSTERA
BNN was sad to report that on the 50th day of Season 4, a Rogue Umpire incident struck the Dallas Steaks, incinerating their teammate and Hitter Stevenson Monstera. Our condolences to family, teammates, incorporeal beings, fans, pets, and others effected by this loss.
BEYOND THE HIGHEST OF HIGHS AND LOWEST OF LOWS, THE FIRST HALF OF SEASON 4 INCLUDED A FEW EXTRA SURPRISES.
After a few games at the beginning of this season, it was looking like the Hades Tigers, and by extension 2x Blaseball League MVP Jessica Telephone, might just be a normal Blaseball team after all. However, 20 games into the season, this is anything but true. The wielder of the Dial Tone swallowed a stray Peanut and had a yummy reaction, raising her from a 5* to a 5.5* player. Just when we at BNN thought that Jessica Telephone and the Tigers couldn’t get better, we were proven wrong. Of course, Jessica is now on the Pies. So we were… PROVEN WRONG AGAIN.
After an amazing effort that started with a simple Single and that was followed by stealing 2nd, 3rd, and then home base, New York Millennials star player Sandie Turner returned to the team dugout to find the 3-Blood Blagonball. Together with the 5-Blood Blagonball that was found by Splorts Fans before the beginning of Season 4, this is starting to look like a trend. However, I’m not worried!
THAT’S ALL FOLKS.
A FEW FINAL THOUGHTS.
First off, here are the standings by the end of day Day 49 (not 50, whoops).
As of Day 50, even after the loss of their star hitter and three losses in a row to their own division rival Philly Pies, the Hades Tigers still remain on top of the league. The New York Millennials and Chicago Firefighters continue to nip at their heels. There’s still plenty of Blaseball left to play! More in-depth divisional analysis will be coming in the games 51-60 update.
Thanks for reading and enjoying our news updates throughout the first half of Season 4. We hope you’ll continue to stay tuned to BNN and liking our coverage. Our Day 51-60 summary will be here before you know it!