JESSICA TELEPHONE. THAT’S THE HEADLINE.

WELCOME.

HELLO ALL,

And welcome to another Blaseball recap by yours truly, Benson “Nutty” Newton. As the Blaseball News Network’s sole intern, I’m glad to have been delegated the task of these roundups from my Sentient News Network bosses. Without further ado, lets jump into the last 10 days worth of news! It sure was packed with some unique surprises.

feedback sends jessica home. kinda.

Right at the beginning of a three game series between the Hades Tigers and the Philly Pies, a massive storm of feedback sent 2x League MVP 5.5* Hitter and Wielder of the Dial Tone Jessica Telephone back to her Season 2 home, the Philly Pies. The Pies aren’t to be confused with Season 1 home, the Dallas Steaks. In return for arguably the best player in all of Blaseball, the League Leading Hades Tigers received the 1* Batting Spears Taylor. However, as a 4* Defensive expert, Taylor brings a much needed boost to what was once the worst defense in The Evil League.

The transfer of Jessica to the Pies raises a large amount of questions surrounding the rest of the season. Will this spark a Pies comeback, helping them reach the playoffs and Ascension after their third ILB title win? Will the loss of such a strong player lessen calls for Taming the Tigers? We can’t wait to find out.

another blagonball found.

WHAT ARE THEY COMMISH

After an amazing effort that started with a simple Single and that was followed by stealing 2nd, 3rd, and then home base, New York Millennials star player Sandie Turner returned to the team dugout to find the 3-Blood Blagonball. Together with the 5-Blood Blagonball that was found by Splorts Fans before the beginning of Season 4, this is starting to look like a trend. However, I’m not worried!

THE COMMISSIONER IS DOING A GREAT JOB.

INSULT TO INJURY.

Following her return to the Pies on Day 43, Jess & Co proceeded to sweep the heavily favored, still-league-topping Hades Tigers in their three game set. That’s it. That’s the news.

tragedy strikes.

BNN is sad to report that on the 50th day of Season 4, a Rogue Umpire incident struck the Dallas Steaks, incinerating their teammate and Hitter Stevenson Monstera. Our condolences to family, teammates, incorporeal beings, fans, pets, and others effected by this loss.

standings.

As of Day 50, even after the loss of their star hitter and three losses in a row to their own division rival Philly Pies, the Hades Tigers still remain on top of the league. The New York Millennials and Chicago Firefighters continue to nip at their heels. There’s still plenty of Blaseball left to play! More in-depth divisional analysis will be coming in the games 51-60 update.

THAT’S ALL FOLKS.

Thanks for tuning in to another roundup from me, Benson “Nutty” Newton. With that, we’re about 50% through the almighty Season 4 of The Cultural Event that is Blaseball. We hope you’ll join us for our next recap.

the commissioner is doing a great job.

FOLLOW US ON TWITTER. PLEASE.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *