Hello, and welcome to the BNN update from your favorite intern, Benson “Nutty” Newton! It’s already been a whole seven days of competition here in the almighty world of The Cultural Event of Blaseball and this season is turning out to be a doozy.
the discipline era: Feedback
It seems that the Discipline Era is still alive and well but storms of massive Feedback have joined the party of Birds, Peanuts, and Solar Eclipses that harry our beloved players every time they trot out onto the Blaseball field. It didn’t take long for the Blaseball universe to find out the effects of these Feedback storms, as in a mysterious event, the Chicago Firefighter’s 4* Hitter Paula Mason and Dallas Steaks’ 2.5* Hitter Thomas Kirby swapped team allegiances after their head-to-head competition on day four of the season. Though well over 50 games have been effected by feedback thusfar, this is the only direct effect BNN has observed it having on any player. Keep tuned here for further updates.
23 RUNS – THE HAWAII FRIDAYS GET IT DONE
In day three of competition, the Hawaii Fridays put up 23 runs to the Charleston Shoe Thieves’ 8, setting a new single game score record, beating the previous record of 20 runs! Congratulations to the Fridays for this great team effort and all that it involves. BNN is sure this record will be broken before we know it, however!
SUNBEAMS UPSET TIGERS
As a rousing start to the new season, the Hellmouth Sunbeams defeated their close Lawful Evil division rivals, the Hades Tigers 14-5. As a decided underdog, the team was given only a 38% chance to win by the Betting Blaseball Gods. Of course, our Sunbeams expert wasn’t surprised.
With batters like Dudley Mueller, Nagomi Nava, and Alaynabella Hollywood, there’s no question in my mind how the Sunbeams pulled off this win. Plus, I’m sure the Tigers were resting a bit on their laurels after two Blaseball Series wins and the acquisition of such a skilled player. This seems to have woken them up, as the Tigers squad has dominated the rest of the season so far.Benson “Nutty” Newton
DIVISION STANDINGS AND BOX SCORES
thanks for reading
Thanks for reading this recap of the first seven days of glorious Season Four of the Cultural Event of Blaseball. We hope you’ll tune in tomorrow for more coverage of the greatest happenings in our beloved Splort.
AND REMEMBER, THE COMMISSIONER IS DOING A GREAT JOB.