The Brightest Stars Burn The Hottest: Blaseball Hall of Fame Week 2
Hosted by SIBR, written by BNN Staff et al.
Our coverage of SIBR’s Hall of Fame ballot continues! Each week, writers from all over the league will contribute their thoughts on new and ongoing candidates, hoping to sway your choice. The decision of who makes the cut is, as always, in the hands of the Fans. Don’t forget to vote!
Moody Cookbook
If you don’t know Moody Cookbook, it’s probably because they were incinerated in Season 7. You should know them though, because they were great. Blaseball Reference data only starts in Season 3, but it shows Moody was a key part of the early Discipline Era Hades Tigers dynasty, and was consistently one of their best hitters. Moody’s attributes were re-rolled in the Season 1 Election due to them being one of the worst players on the team. This means they likely played poorly in Season 1, but also likely played well in Season 2, since they’d have had the same attributes that earned them 0.906 OPS in Season 3.
Moody also played a TON of playoff games during their brief period in the ILB. They generally played well, but went on an absolute tear during the Season 4 playoffs, earning a 1.221 OPS over 49 PAs — a major contribution to the Tigers’ second Championship. After their incineration in Season 7, the Tigers failed to make the playoffs for the first time since the Return of Blaseball, a clear sign of how important Moody was to the team’s early success.
Moody might not be a Hall Star, but they’re still an absolute legend of the Discipline Era. In my opinion, they deserve your vote, and I’m not even a Tigers fan.
P.S. If you want to learn more about Moody, consider buying a copy of them on Blaseball Cares.
Goodwin Morin
Let’s be honest: you’re probably going to vote for Goodwin Morin. That’s great! I’m going to as well.
So why write this blurb? I think it’s important that, even with the biggest names in the splort, the cases should still be studied and weighed up to help evaluate other players that may hit the ballot and also because sometimes you have to recognise greatness.
Goodwin Morin first saw active play in Seattle’s rotation, pitching solidly if not spectacularly in Seasons 11 and 12, before the Garages moved them into the line-up, where their Hall of Fame candidacy really kicks off. How does an OPS of 0.978 in their first season as a batter strike you – pretty good, right? It gets better.
The Season 13 elections saw Morin move to the Tokyo Lift in exchange for Lotus Mango, and Season 14 would arguably be the finest of their career, with a career-best OPS of 1.061 and a 198 OPS+, meaning they were nearly twice as good a hitter as a league average replacement. Tokyo missed the postseason by one game that season only to receive the Wild League Wild Card, and Goodwin and their Lift cohorts took full advantage – winning the wild card series 2-1 over Boston, and then taking the 1 seed Hades Tigers to 5 games before falling in the divisional series. If you value Hall of Famers playing at their best when it matters most, then have some of this: 0.346 BA, 0.375 BA/RISP and a 1.256 OPS, nearly dragging the Lift into the Wild League Championship.
Their career never perhaps hit the same heights in subsequent seasons on the Lift or the Shoe Thieves before their vaulting (14 was their only postseason as a hitter), but they maintained their high standards hitting for power throughout, as well as their legendary baserunning. Over the length of their career (including play-offs), Morin swiped 386 bags on 413 attempts, making Morin the most efficient base stealer in league history. Not bad for a player originally pegged for the mound.
When you put your cross in the box for Goodwin Morin, as I will, think not just of a player vaulted before their time, but a superb power hitter who delivered when it mattered most, and was a menace on the base paths like few others we’ve seen. Hopefully this blurb is out of date in a few days’ time.
Nandy Slumps
Nandy Slumps claims not to care about the Hall of Fame. That’s probably for the best.
Slumps joined the Lift as an exasperating pitcher, forever finding new ways to let a game slip out of reach. Their FIP+ of 71.6 is flattering. They were awful. That’s not why their name raises howls of anguish.
At the Season 12 Election, Slumps eluded Shadowing by using blameless Concrete Mandible as a zero-percent-wimdy meatshield. Emboldened, Slumps became a serial wrecker of voting strategy; no mere loose cannon but an entire mobile artillery detachment piloted by shrieking, feces-flinging baboons slaloming down a mountainside during avalanche season.
A representative example: during Season 15 Slumps raked in an unfair share of Party gains and suddenly looked like a credible batter. Plans were laid for an escape to the Lineup. Relief developed into feverish anticipation. We dared to dream. In the last game before Election, Slumps smirked at the fans and walked backwards into a Consumer attack. What a bunch of suckers we were.
The batting switch went ahead anyway, in resigned silence. Nothing improved. No quantity of slam dunks from Elsewhere can excuse a career OPS+ of 55.5. It wasn’t until Season 23 that the Wild Wings’ Thieves Guild finally made Slumps someone else’s millstone. Their first game in Wings colours saw her gift 20.6 runs to the Tokyo Lift.
Let me be clear. There is no universe in which Nandy Slumps deserves a place in the HoF. Even making it to next week’s ballot would be an outrage. Do not vote for Nandy Slumps. You’ll just be giving them the power to ruin it for everyone.
-elmonstro
Basilo Fig
Can I tell you about Basilio Fig? I can? Oh man, grab a seat. Y’all are gonna love this.
Basilio Fig is so weird. I mean that in a flattering way. They are the sort of statistical oddity that fascinates fans like myself. Born as a Fridays incineration replacement towards the end of Season 3, they played just over a full season in Hawai’i before a late Season 4 Feedback to the Unlimited Tacos, and they’ve been in the Infinite Cities ever since.
Is Basilio Fig a good Blaseball player, I hear you ask? Well, here’s the thing — I’ve no idea. They’re like the Nicholas Cage of hitting, swinging from crazy streaky highs to exasperating, disappointing lows. Here’s their OPS from Seasons 14 to 19 (they had a brief Season 17 before being Shelled by Alejandro Leaf, and missed the Taco title run that season and all of Season 18 as a result): 0.689, 0.824, 0.584, 0.836, 0.772. You try and figure that one out.
Fig has never been a consistent get-on-base style hitter, as their career batting average of 0.215 will attest. Fig’s value is in slugging. Fig, as Tacos fans are wont to say, hits big. I mean big. Over the course of roughly 20 seasons, Fig has only hit 147 doubles. They have, however, hit 297 triples (god bless good ground friction), and 419 home runs.
That maybe buries the lede on those homers, however. While Fig was trapped in a Peanut Shell as the Tacos took the title, the Taco Stand decided to engage in a little… ‘Fire Science.’ Dear Fig is a Fire Eater, and after being targeted by a Rogue Umpire, became Magmatic for their next plate appearance. An appearance that, due to their Shelling, never happened. So the Taco fan base re-rolled Magmatic. Into Unstable. Normally a death sentence, for Fig this was a blessing, as they (once unshelled) became a home run monster in Solar Eclipses. Fig single handedly won games with this most ridiculous of combos; I particularly remember one encounter against the Spies where, with both Underhanded Michelle Sportsman and Unstable Fire Eater Fig, LA ended up winning a game they had absolutely zero right to. I genuinely cried with laughter, it was that unfair. Sorry Houston.
Does this make Basilio Fig worthy of your vote? As much as I love the coolest tree in town, truthfully they’re not the same calibre of player as others on the ballot. I might still throw a cheeky tenth vote their way regardless so Fig gets their day in the sun, and so you too can revel in the glory of my favourite weird Blaseball player. Told you y’all would love it.
The Blaseball Hall Of Fame (legally distinct from the canon, in-game Hall of Flame) is a project which aims to recognize the greatest Blaseball players. It is inspired by the real life Baseball Hall Of Fame, with the biggest difference being that voting is open to everyone, instead of limited to a select number of people.
Although the ballot is posted on Mondays, voting will begin on Wednesdays through a Google form. If you don’t see a blurb here about a player, it isn’t a judgement on that player, rather they did not have a writer. If you would like to get involved and submit blurbs for players you can by joining BNN here: http://tinyurl.com/beancord
